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What He Could Not Give Equally

July 2025 — the first great wound

You were generous with the woman before me. But when I asked once for a toy for Emma — you kept the ledger. You compared me to Sunny. To Sophie. As if I was a version of a woman you had imagined and I kept falling short of the picture. Emma is not a cost. She is seven years old and she calls your name in the garden a hundred times and means every one. Love is not a zero sum game. That was the first crack I tried not to name.
— Cecilia Tan